The Onion: Multiple Stab Wounds May Be Harmful To Monkeys
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Desc: Repeatedly stabbing monkeys with sharpened objects may have an adverse effect on their health, according to a new study.
More coverage at: http://onion.com |
The Onion: Blockbuster Offers Glimpse Of Movie Renting Past
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Desc: The Blockbuster Video Living Museum offers tourists a glimpse of how Americans rented movies before the advent of services like Netflix and iTunes.
More coverage at: http://onion.com |
The Onion: Gunman Kills 15 Potential Swing Voters
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Desc: The Obama campaign is cautiously optimistic after initial reports indicated that most of the people killed were registered Republicans. |
The Onion: Meteorologists Predict Worst Autumn Ever
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Desc: Experts advise that anyone venturing outdoors should be on the lookout for extremely crunchy leaves and winds as high as 12 mph. |
Obama Win Causes Obsessed Backers To See How Empty Lives Are
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Desc: The revelation that Obama's candidacy was the only thing that gave their lives any meaning has caused many supporters to wander aimlessly, unsure of what to do with themselves. |
The Onion: Supreme Court: Death Penalty Is 'Totally Badass'
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Desc: Despite arguments against capital punishment, the Justices overwhelmingly approved its use, especially if they get to participate in some executions. |
The Onion: Obama Runs Constructive Criticism Ad On McCain
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Desc: In response to Republican attacks, Barack Obama unleashed a series of slightly negative ads that gently point out how McCain could be doing a better job. |
The Onion: Are We Giving Robots Too Much Power?
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Desc: Panelists discuss whether controversial decisions by the Robot Congress and President Executron indicate robots have too much control over our lives.
More coverage at: http://onion.com |
The Onion: All Online Data Lost After Internet Crash
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Desc: Breaking News, officials confirm that all online data has been lost after the Internet crashed and was forced to restart.
More coverage at: http://www.onion.com |
The Onion: '9/11 Conspiracy Theories Ridiculous' - Al Qaeda
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Desc: An Al Qaeda representative says that claims the U.S. government was behind the attacks on Sept. 11th are demeaning to Al Qaeda.
More coverage at: http://onion.com |
The Onion: Diebold Accidentally Leaks Results Of 08 Election
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Desc: Embarrassed Diebold officials apologized after one of their electronic voting machines prematurely revealed the winner of our upcoming sham election.
More coverage at: http://onion.com |
The onion Movie
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Desc: Satirical interpretations of world events and curious human behavior. |
The Onion: Cindy McCain Just Like Any Other Female Human'
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Desc: Despite the media's portrayal of her, Cindy McCain says she is a down-to-earth person who enjoys breathing oxygen and consuming earth food for energy. |
The Onion: Weather Channel Accused of Pro-Weather Bias
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Desc: Critic claims The Weather Channel shamelessly overreports stories on hurricanes and weekend forecasts at the expense of other news. |
The Onion: The Beijing Olympics - Are They A Trap?
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Desc: 'In The Know' panelists discuss whether our athletes will be able to escape the bamboo cages the Chinese government will try to imprison them in. |
The Onion: Sources Warn Miley Cyrus Will Be Depleted by 2013
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Desc: Unless Americans turn to alternative sources of entertainment, the 'Hannah Montana' star will soon be completely tapped out. |
The Onion: 12-Year-Old Boy Scouts Offer To Give Breast Exams
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Desc: Two prospective Eagle Scouts explain how they are preventing breast cancer by helping women examine their breasts. |
